Alfonso Linguini on Utopia Stories Library

Fixing Beth's Problems

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

“I never knew your minivan had so much space in the back.” Tim was momentarily startled but quickly relaxed when he saw his good friend Beth looking at him through his van’s open rear doors.

“Oh sure. There’s lots of space when you take out the seats.” Tim unrolled the cushion and centered it on the van floor. He tossed two gray blankets on top of the cushion. “I’m sure you’ll find the ride very comfortable. Are you sure you want to do this?”

Her Ancestors

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

The doorbell rang. “Come in!” I yelled, “It’s unlocked!” Leah was already setting her shoes by the door before I finished the sentence. Chinese people don’t like to wear shoes inside for some reason.

Leah raced across the room in her cute little yellow tennis outfit and jumped into my lap. Putting her arms around my neck she said, “David, can we play ‘Seat Belt’ tonight? My back hurts and it would really help.”

Nerdboy and the Cheerleader

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Author's Note: I wrote this story a little over five years ago as “Beauty and the Geek” and the time shifting I used confused a lot of people. I decided to rewrite it with all the events in chronological order and I fixed some punctuation and other errors. Going over it again showed me that I’ve improved as a writer these past five years. Not that I’m a great writer now, but I’m better at it than I was back then! I hope you all enjoy the story more this way as well. - Alfonso Linguini (aka One Hit Wonder)

Photo Session

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Jen adjusted the shoulder strap of her frilly pink and yellow sun dress. She tilted her head to the left. Her golden blonde hair flowed over her shoulder. “You know I’ve never modeled before.”

The studio flash units fired simultaneously as Mark depressed his Nikon’s shutter button. “It’s hard to believe that someone as beautiful as you hasn’t been the apple of someone’s lens.”

Jen smiled. “You’re sweet, Mark. I bet you say that to all the girls.”

Sam and Amy

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

“Hi” said the girl.

“Hello there” replied the startled but dignified looking older gentleman.

“My name is Amy.”

“I am Sam.”

“It’s a sorority prank.” Amy answered the obvious question before it was asked. “I don’t usually take off all my clothes and handcuff myself to a public toilet.”

“I hadn’t noticed the cuffs.” Sam stepped forward and looked behind Amy as she leaned forward. Her hands were fastened together by a set of handcuffs. Those cuffs in turn were tethered to the toilet’s silver plumbing by another set of handcuffs. As Sam stepped back, Amy extended her bare legs. Her ankles were also cuffed.

The Sign In

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Cindy and Tony walked through the park, hand in hand, sharing the concrete walkway with skateboarders, joggers, baby strollers and other couples. All were enjoying their beautiful sunny Sunday in Baxter Park.

They passed a lamp post. Tony glanced up. “That was so cool,” he sighed to himself.

“What was cool?” asked Cindy.

“Oh nothing. It was just a daydream I had.”

Cindy stopped and looked into Tony’s eyes. “I hate it when you do that. You got all this stuff going on in your mind and you keep it secret. This time I insist that you tell me what’s going on in your mind.”

The Time Out

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Donna knew she deserved her time out. She had no right to insult Rick’s mother the way she did. Not everyone had a talent for cooking. Just because Donna was a great chef didn’t mean that everyone was born with that gift. So when Rick’s mother stormed out of the house after Donna’s callous comment about her dry-as-sand meatloaf, Donna knew she was in trouble.

“Time Out!” yelled her angry husband, Rick. “Two hours!”

Triumph the Bondage Dog

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Monica was enjoying a leisurely run, happily navigating the twists and turns presented by a trail someone had cut through a heavily wooded section of Baxter park. It was another beautiful Sunday in paradise. As she ran, Monica realized that moving to the south was one of the best decisions she’d ever made. While Monica’s friends and family were inside hiding from the blizzards up north, Monica was outside in shorts and a t-shirt, drinking in the bright warm sun.

Value, Utility and Price

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Scott Wilson sat quietly in his favorite reading chair, contentedly scanning the latest issue of The Rand Economics Journal. Life was good for the newest addition to the UCLA Economics Department. Landing such a plush teaching job just three months after completing his doctoral studies was a dream come true. Scott knew that he’d be stuck teaching undergraduate Econ courses for the first few years. But he was only 24 years old and had lots of time to establish himself.

Water Slide

Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Chapter 1 - Jason

Maintenance Monday at the Swim and Slide Water Park was always the most boring day of the week for Jason. As usual, there was nothing to fix. The park was desolate. The food court was locked up. All the rides were silent. Jason scanned the grounds from his perch high atop the five story tall Competition Water Slide platform, shading his eyes from the bright sun. Not a soul in sight. Jason’s white van looked very alone in the large empty parking lot.